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26-Aug-2017 17:36

Internet dating is meant to tip those odds in our favour — and it can work, of course it can.But the people I’ve spoken to who’ve been bruised by it are unanimous as to why that happened. As my friend Adam says: ‘It’s blackly comic: we all say we’re fun-loving, up for a laugh, just seeing how things go — when everyone knows that we’re all on a dating site because, to varying extents, we’re lonely.’ Internet dating pivots around ­profiles; lists of attributes, paragraphs where you attempt to make yourself sound appealing, a handful of flattering photographs. Dozens of books and websites offer advice on how to write profiles; third-party services even charge 40 quid to save you the bother. ­Everyone loves travelling, particularly to Machu Picchu — which, if the profiles are to be believed, is an Inca site swarming with thousands of backpacking singletons. All of us love to curl up on the sofa with a bottle of wine and a DVD (or a VD, as one unfortunately mis-spelled profile said).Those words of wisdom still apply, and particularly so if you’re one of those participating in the seemingly eternal worry-go-round of internet dating.The adverts for such services, featuring blissfully happy couples pushing each other on swings, would have us believe otherwise.Back in 1966, The Supremes told us you can’t hurry love.Sixteen years later Phil Collins concurred when he sang ‘You just have to wait’, additionally noting that ‘love don’t come easy’.

So let me ask you, how do you feel about eliminating age from the profile questionnaire? One of the most common lies for those internet dating is their posted age.Age is a tricky factor when it comes to dating for fear of being rejected if you’re perceived too old.Men will lie about their height, men and women will lie about their age, some people even upload photos of other people and pretend it’s them. And once you realise this, internet dating feels as random as approaching strangers in a car park and asking them if they fancy you. Searching for a partner online has inevitable similarities to searching for a product.

Computer algorithms have the herculean task of returning a ­perfect match from a database based on our own vaguely truthful sub­missions, and such copper-bottomed compatibility guarantees whether both parties are fond of cats.For some, listing their true age in their online dating profile is a conflict for fear of being overlooked.